Focusing on the positive
There are times when I want to give up. When I think everything I write is trash, and everything I’ve done up to this point has been an exercise in futility. I’ve been struggling with that a lot lately, because it’s human nature to fixate on the negative and forget about the positive.
I know this feeling is wrong, but it’s tough to shake. And sometimes, I don’t know what else to do but write about what I’m experiencing. It helps me process.
Instead of writing another post about ANTs (you can read the previous ones here: ANTs and The Source of the ANTs if you’re inclined), I’d rather focus on some of the good things I’ve experienced recently. They’re worth remembering. They’re worth mentioning. And in the grand scheme of things, they’re more important than the doubts that spring up from a single instance of negativity.
Exile surpassed 1000 lifetime (paid) sales in April.
That was a huge milestone, and one I didn’t believe I’d ever reach. I’m not the best at advertising, and social media has become so toxic, I haven’t been nearly as active in the last six months as I once was. Both of those things hurt my potential sales, which is why I’m so grateful to the readers who have found Exile and decided to purchase a copy.
While not everyone who reads that book continues with the series, I still get a significant amount of readthrough. Knowing that people enjoy the first book enough to keep reading is the best feeling in the world. It’s worth remembering and making note of.
(Side note: Because I hit this milestone, I’m planning a series sale at the end of May. More details will be shared on the 22nd, so watch for that.)
My stories and characters seem to stick with people.
While Exile and The Caein Legacy are the books I’m best known for, and I’ve had many people tell me that story isn’t just good, but memorable, there are other books that have made an impression too.
One of the books I’m most proud of (although it rarely gets any attention) is Serpentus. And there is one scene near the midpoint of the story that seems to get a serious reaction from readers. Korra of Bakserville Book Reviews pinged me in a post a few weeks ago mentioning Serpentus and how it “mentally haunted” them, over a year after they first read the book. (You can read the full thread on Bluesky, here.)
Author achievement unlocked.
Now, if I could just get more people to give that book a shot… (I’m learning that standalones are a hard-sell, at least in my case. Popular opinion on social media is that they should be easier to convince people to check out, but my personal experience has been the opposite. I’m not sure why that is.)
I also got an amazing review (one of the first) for Wraith and the Revolution that compared Kye and Pablo to a sci-fi version of Frodo and Sam. For as much feeling and emotion I try to inject into my characters, that was also a big win. You can read the full review on Goodreads, here.
The positives far outweigh the negatives.
This is the most difficult thing for me to remember. I have weeks when those doubts I mentioned before all come bubbling back to the surface for one reason or another. I’m not sure if there’s any way to stop them from reappearing, other than to remind myself of the good things.
Sometimes it’s really hard to remember, but I’m trying. And writing about the wins, however small they are, helps (so I hope you don’t mind that I chose to share some of these positive moments with you.)